I choose to start the movie...now #SniperMirren
Things I forgot about RED: it's originally a DC comic by Warren Ellis #SniperMirren
The cast of RED is this bizarre mixture of spectacular and dreadful #SniperMirren
You go from Bruce Willis to Morgan Freeman to Helen Mirren to...Karl Urban? Really? #SniperMirren
You ever been to Chile? "Yeah" "What's it like?" "Mountains" "That's it?" "It was night" #SniperMirren
I'm positing a theory of trashy films: any combination of Bruce Willis + Christmas, without a sequel being involved, is okay #SniperMirren
Flatemate: why are you going to swear at this film? Me: Helen Fucking Mirren with a Fucking Sniper Rifle #SniperUrban
Flatmate: Whose the rubbish actor in this? Me: Karl Urban. Flatmate: What's wrong with Karl Urban? #SniperMirren
And we' just hit the first instance of "OH FUCK YEAH" in the film. There's something awesome about old Bruce Willis, hard-ass. #SniperMirren
My, that is a lot of bullets they're using #SniperMIrren
Flatmate: I stand by my thesis that Karl Urban is a fine actor who makes bad choices. 1 of which you'll watch in 2 weeks. #SniperMirren
Smooth, Bruce. "It's me, Frank. The avocado". #SniperMirren
You've got to love a spy who vacuums a little before he kidnaps you for your own safety. #SniperMirren
Flatmate: The thing I'm struggling with? That's Mary Louise Parker, drug dealer. 7 Seasons of Weeds. #SniperMirren
I have to admit, this is the role that both supports and disproves the Flatmate's Keith Urban thesis #SniperMirren
More people should cast Morgan Freeman as a dirty old man. #SniperMirren
Wow, this is just like Love's Savage Secret...#SniperMirren
Instances of Bruce Willis being Obscenely Bad-Ass: 2 #SniperMirren
I mean, stepping out of a car that's spinning on the blacktop to shoot at the guy who rammed you? BAD ASS #SniperMirren
Also utterly implausible, and yet it makes me love the movie more #SniperMirren
I was hoping not to get kidnapped...or drugged. I was hoping you would have hair. #SniperMirren
You can't just go around duct-taping everyone. People are basically decent. "That hasn't been my experience" #SniperMirren
Mrs. KIM! #SniperMirren
This is a really odd moment of the film if you're a Gilmore Girls fan. #SniperMirren
Flatmate: Morgan Freeman was just total stunt-casting, wasn't he? Me: ... #SniperMirren
Flatmate: How fast are they driving the damn car? #SniperMirren
Hey look, John Malkovitch is playing a total nutcase. I'm sure you're all shocked #SniperMirren
RED: Retired, Extremely Dangerous. #SniperMirren
The thing that really makes this film work? Karl Urban and Rebecca Pidgeon. Utterly straight. #SniperMirren
When I could feel their eyes on me. Wet...like...like peaches. Best Line Ever. #SniperMirren
I have to admit, this rewatch is less about snarking on the film and more about watching my flatemate watch RED #SniperMirren
Instances of John Malkovitch being absurdly bad-ass: 1. Bruce still leads the pack. #SniperMirren
The lesson of every spy film, ever? Check the ID of your emergency response personnel and SWAT teams #SniperMirren
Flatmate: This is basically a really terrible choice of movie for a Trashy Tuesday Movie. Me: Yep, pretty much. #SniperMIrren
And so we have learnt our lesson - movies that are affectionately terrible work, films that actually rock...don't. #SniperMirren
Fortunately, it's not a mistake we're making for the next six weeks. #SniperMirren
The line-up, in order: Red Dawn; DOOM; Resident Evil; House of the Dead; DOA; Double Dragon; Tekken #TrashyTuesdayMovie
HELEN MIRREN WITH A SNIPER RIFLE. #SniperMirren
Helen Mirren makes my favorite cinematic death-threats ever #SniperMirren
Almost as cool as Helen Mirren with a sniper rifle? John Malkovitch wearing a garbage bag #SniperMirren
And suddenly the film stops being funny and goes dark as hell #SniperMirren
So the subtext of this film is simple: Don't order Bruce Willis killed. And give English actors heavy weapons #SniperMirren
Instances of Bruce Willis being a hardcore bad-ass: 3. I'm surprised, I could have sworn it was more #SniperMirren
And were done. Alas, this film was far too good to generate any decent snark #SniperMirren